98/06/06
Checked for updates 2005_08_14

Four Steps Discussion

The Future
Driving backward brings me present.
How to Reclaim Denied Spirit
Take More Love for Yourself
What is mine and what is yours?

The Future

pp1
How can You drive backwards,
not looking to the future,
and at the same time have a Plan
that involves our future evolutions?
As I consciously choose to do this healing work
and face backwards,
and as I struggle with my old patterns
of projecting myself into the future
(a deep habit to break!),
I often am stumped as to how to realize this.
Can You give some input here, please.

"Yes, driving backward
is the most challenging part of my advice
to those spirits who wish to evolve and heal more quickly.
And there is a big difference
between getting visions or seeing the plan,
and projecting yourself into the future.
Your visions are an important part of your evolution.

And I've said that while you have visions, I have a plan.
The truth is that for a very long time I had another plan,
but since I discovered Grandfather's,
I've let go of mine and have aligned with his.

"Grandfather's plan
is simply more grand and inclusive and vital that mine was,
and I know the power of Grandfather's grace
is more and more quickly drawing us closer to him and his Desire,
as it guides us toward wholeness.
When you receive a vision of the future,
it comes to you as part of the plan.
And that's all you need to know about it
or do about it.
It's there, and it's safe.
It will come to pass more or less as you envision it,
the essential elements will all manifest.

"As you look back upon the visions you've had,
you will find that certain parts of them have already manifested,
and others have not yet come into your reality.
This is the difference between visions and the plan,
the plan has an element of timing
that has never been completely captured in a vision.
This unseeable dimension
makes it impossible to turn to the future
and project ahead to
what you'll be doing in each step
toward the realization of your vision.
That's why it's easier and faster
to not try to second guess the timing of the plan,
and to drive backward,
feeling for my presence
and the stream of Grandfather's grace
for guidance in your direction.

"The habit of projecting yourself into the future
and imagining yourself doing things there
goes way back in your evolution as manifested beings.
It was one of the two major distinctions
between humans and other mammals,
long before the land of Pan manifested here
with spiritual beings in physical human forms.
[In Godchannel The Land of Pan is mentioned also in .spirit2 and in .reality4.
A detailed description exists only in Right Use of Will, p. 74-93]

"The other unique trait of humans
has been the love of learning through experimentation,
which is related to future projecting.
Both of these are very valuable skills for surviving and thriving in physical reality,

pp1
" but future projecting
is an impediment to healing into wholeness.

Of course, if you have a destination other than wholeness,
or if you believe you already know how to achieve wholeness,
driving backward will not make sense to you.

"Breaking a habit that is this deeply ingrained in your genes
is very good work,
and may require more patience and self-acceptance
than you've needed for breaking other habits
that no longer serve you. So here is my advice.

"First, let yourself off the hook
for having to do it perfectly from the beginning.
You're learning something new,
and it will feel strange and unaccustomed for awhile,
and there will be many times
when you find yourself doing it the old way.

"Second, simply

" catch yourself
when you find yourself projecting into the future
and ask,
'Do I know enough about this situation
to find the healing in it,
and find my way through it into wholeness?'

If the answer is, 'Yes,' ask yourself, "Am I sure?'
If the answer is, 'No,' ask yourself,
'How can I find the stream of grace
to guide me through it?'

"The answer here will be to turn around
and let the future happen according to the plan,
because right now the present moment is calling you home.

"It is only in this moment now
that anything can be done anyway.
And the best view of the moment
is not looking out from it
into the formless void of the future.
The best view from here is to look back upon this moment
as the culmination of all other moments.
Look back from now
and realize that this is the farthest into the future
anyone has ever been.
Right now you're on top of all Creation.
Stay here with me now a while longer

"as we connect with the stream of Grandfather's grace.

"Healing happens, and wholeness is coming."

Driving backward brings me present

pp1
I have been gradually digesting Your guidance
about "driving backwards" through Creation.
It really made me stop and do a turn around
in my thinking about myself and my world
and how I create,
especially the me that tends
towards projecting into the future
as a way to accomplish things.
The more I stayed with this
I began to see and understand how,
like you said God,
Creation is always happening in the present moment,
and in my projecting into the future
I really am missing the wonder and magic of Now.

"There have many other versions of this same guidance.
Becoming fully present in the moment is more than magic.
It's a miracle, and nearly every human
who has accomplished it
has tried to tell the others about how it's done.
The real journey for spirit doesn't begin
until you've learned how to 'be here now'.

"Turning around and facing backward
is the same as 'going within',
in that it changes your attention
from looking outward toward the future
to looking inward
toward where it has all come from.
Since the present moment
is the farthest into the future
anyone has been in linear time,
you can be completely on top of it all
when you turn backward and face inward.

"Carlos Castaneda discussed this same subject with his mentor, Don Juan
[the link points to "My Messengers", but Carlos Castaneda is not mentioned there!]
who called it "stopping the world",
or essentially compiling linear time into a single present moment.
It's only possible to stop the world while facing backward.
When you face forward you're leading the world into the future,
and you can not simultaneously stop it and lead it onward."

And each time I repeat patterns,
especially ones that don't feel good,
it is me choosing once again to live
and believe such realities.
Why are some of these creations so hard to change?

"They are difficult to change
because it's hard to find them while facing forward.
They are part of where you're coming from,
and the first step is to turn around
and begin looking and feeling for them.
This is the trouble most people have
in making changes in themselves,
first becoming aware they have a pattern that isn't helpful,
and realizing it's their creation
and therefore something they can change.

"You've done the hardest part already when you've gotten this far.
From here the four steps are relatively easy.

First intend to change the pattern,
second align with me in driving backward
and collect all the information you can about the pattern,
third release any judgments that support the pattern,
and fourth move the emotions
that have been held in check by the pattern
or the judgments that created it.

"As you can see, this cannot be done while facing forward.
What usually happens in that case is
(that) a new pattern is tried in hope it will replace the old one,
but then the two patterns come in competition with each other,
and of course the older and stronger pattern usually wins out.
Just like in judgment release,
it's important to release what has been in place
before attempting to replace it with what you want."

I also see how my future projections
are in many ways fear avoidance,
where instead of staying present with my fears
and helping them release into whatever they need,
I rise above them with my mental energies
and try to arrange future situations
such that Fear won't exist.
But I know now this doesn't and hasn't worked
to really give me the peace and joy I want.
So, as you have suggested God,
I am turning myself around
and working my way to the front of the bus with You.
Your presence here is reassuring to me,
especially because driving backwards is new to me after so long efforting to drive forwards.
[See about the metaphor of God's driving a bus in .godpage]

"Yes, and like anything new
it takes a little practice to get good at it.
You are right to stay present with your fears and anxieties.
Of particular interest are the feelings you get
driving backward not knowing where your life will take you.
In driving backward you're trusting
that you are going as quickly toward wholeness as possible,
with no idea of what that will look like
in terms you're familiar with,
like where you'll live, your work, money, relationships, etc.
Fear of the loss of control is very good to experience and move here."
[the link doesn't point to how it is good to experience fear of the loss of control,
but to how God's initial refusal to experience and move his fear caused all the damage in Creation]

And I am beginning to get it
that using the present moment
to look back on what I have created
is so valuable for learning from experience
and thus guiding in new creations.
I see that so much energy is often spent
on focusing on the future
without having fully digested and integrated the past
that a lot of mistakes are just repeated.
In many ways it makes life
simpler and easier and more fulfilling to drive backwards.
And really, in a sense, all the past is with me in every present moment,
although much of it in a denied state
because I haven't accepted it ~
and so the present moment
offers this amazing opportunity over and over again
to reclaim the parts of me I have disconnected from
as I grow into greater wholeness.

"Your eagerness and willingness helps you to get things quickly.
And you realize
that your tendency has been
to lift out of issues and situations that would bog you down.

"In driving backward you now have the opportunity
to explore the bog
and retrieve the goodness
that had been overlooked before
in leaving too hastily.
This is very good work."

In a meditation I consciously turned around to face my creation.
I tuned in to find the stream of Grandfather's Grace You have spoken about,
and once I connected to it
I understood how much easier it is to remain connected
when I stay in its center facing it directly
than it is when I face away from it into the unmanifest future.
Thanks again Beloved Father for being You
and for being Here and for answering my prayers.
I love you too.

"Amen.

"And know that this 'father' thing is temporary.
As I've said,
these days the best way to understand my role in your life
is as the coach in your journey toward wholeness.
I'm happy to be helpful of course,
but until you don't miss me in the old father role,
you may not be grown up enough
to be wholly on your own,
your own creator."

How to Reclaim Denied Spirit

pp6 and pp26b
I have been reading "The Picture of Dorian Gray" by Oscar Wilde.
In the book there is a scene of heartless brutal killing
which moved me very deeply.
My first instinct was to blow the feeling of evil out of my body ~
get rid of it.
Then I remembered all of the work I have been doing with God
with pulling Loving Light
into any movement I feel of difficult emotions.
So, I opened up to God's Loving Light
and said to myself,
"I open to receive God
into anything within me which I hold as Evil.
Any darkness which I have judged to be Evil
may open and receive Loving Light."

I have had the most wonderful couple of weeks since then.
I have resolved long-standing pain in my life ~
forgiven people I never thought I would forgive.
I have come to understand my husband again as a partner
who is struggling toward love as I am.
Amazingly, healing evil within me
has done more to release my judgments of others
than anything else I have tried.

For the many years I have worked with Right Use of Will
I have had the judgment that said
I must move through each layer of held emotions with intensity and pain,
and only then would there be healing.
God told me recently
that I needed to heal my spiritual fragmentation,
and this is how we have been doing it together.
It has made the emotional healing so much gentler, and deeper,
and more beautiful than I had imagined it being.

In Judaism there is the belief
that in each act of loving-kindness
we bring the male energy of God which lives in the heavens
and the female energy of God which lives on earth closer together.
Thank you, everyone who is moved toward this website
for joining me in our quest for Tikkun Olam ~
the healing of the world.

"You are describing an excellent way to heal denied spirit,
and you state your intention very well,
'I open to receive God into anything within me
which I hold as evil.
Any darkness which I have judged to be evil
may open and receive loving Light.'

pp26b
This healing intention of acceptance of all of your spirit essence
also has the effect of relinquishing control of the situation to me,
or 'driving backward' as I recommend.

pp6 and pp26b
Your intention also includes a release of previous judgments,
and as you report, this
along with calling for my Light as in True Sacrifice
enables you to move the emotions
that had been trapped by the judgments of 'evil'.

pp26b
These are the four steps.

"Most humans have a deep unconscious belief or judgment
that they, or at least a part of them, is evil.
Even those who seem to be quite 'spiritual' have this problem,
but the power of denial has often enabled them to keep it from consciousness.

"When people begin to do this work,
and become aware of previously denied parts of themselves,
they often become aware that they have been hating themselves,
or more to the point, hating the evil within them.
They identify with the evil and realize they feel feelings like hatred,
and the work stalls because they believe they don't deserve to heal.
This is very often something that never quite comes to awareness,
and it's one of the most insidious forms of self-hatred.

pp6 and 26b
The unconscious judgment is,
'I am evil, and therefore I don't deserve to heal.'
Or, 'Because I am evil, I cannot heal.'

"The first priority for healing is
to recognize that it is needed.
The second is to set your intention,
and the third is to release any and all judgments
that say you do not deserve to heal.

pp26b
"And speaking of the first priority,
thank you for receiving me within you
and carrying out our understandings
about the importance of healing the fragmentation of Spirit
before attempting to help the Mother.
Also, Lesson Three of the healing class addresses this issue in depth."

Take More Love for Yourself

Hello God, this site is what I can only call a Godsend.
I needed this and you more than I knew.
I have spent so many years focused only on the Mother.
And here you are, not the harshness I thought your light would be.
I have not felt this happy in such a long time.

"Over the eons many perceptions of me have been formed,
and harshness is definitely one of them, and for good reason.
I had been quite harsh on many occasions,
and particularly with the Mother.
For a long time I thought
I had to be harsh
in order to make the point
that I was hurt or feeling bad,
and needed to be taken seriously.
I too am happier knowing
that harshness is not what I want in my Creation.
Thank you for finding the real me behind that old mask."

What you said about releasing judgment was
what I needed to hear and learn.
It has made such a difference to the way I am able to FEEL.

pp6
"Judgment release is vital to the healing work,
and the most serious judgment is the general one everyone has,
'I am bad.'
This is why the judgment release language always begins with,
'I release the judgment that I am bad because ~
' This speaks directly to [the?] issue
of the fundamental value judgment against self
that is preventing more goodness, including healing.

I feel elated because I have the feeling
that you and the Mother have made great strides together.
I can feel that balance inside me now.

"Yes, you could say
the growing balance
that the Mother and and I are experiencing in Creation
is being reflected in you.
But isn't it even more true the other way around?
I would say that because it is you
who are hosting us in your venue,
it is your new balance that is helping us in Creation."

Is there anything you can tell me, God,
which I need to know at this time?
I really do want you to speak to me.
I love you so much.

"We are communicating on the inside, of course,
and I will add some confirmation here.
You need to know
that the love you pour out toward others
is more than just your own love,
it comes from the Mother and me as well.
As you channel our love into the world,
please take more of it for yourself.
Take it to your heart and know
that you are loved beyond your present capacity to love.
And driving backward,
you will find that the fear of not being loved
and not being worthy of love
moves easiest when the Mother's and my love for you
is running strongly in your own energy."

What is mine and what is yours?

The whole dialogue mentioned but not yet quoted in pp31
Thank you for the changes to the True Sacrifice page.
They have helped me; however, I still am afraid of:
"After a few moments, imagine the ray of Light
drawing the feeling up toward me
while more Light comes down into the energy center ~
where the feeling has been."
I fear being tricked into giving up my essence,
and don't feel comfortable doing this exercise
unless I can conceive of it's helping me.

"Thank you very much for expressing your fear here.
My intentions with the 'True Sacrifice' exercise
are to offer a very simple way
of working with Spirit in the healing work,
and to clarify the misconceptions about God
wanting something from humans by way of sacrifice.
The page has recently been revised
to bring it closer to meeting these intentions,
and I very much appreciate your reflection
that this information still needs to be expanded and stated more clearly.

"I don't want you to give up anything of yourself,
and in fact my wish is
that you get back all of yourself and become whole.

pp34 and pp28
"You are right to not do things
that don't feel right,
regardless of the source of the advice.
Your own sense of what is right for you
or not right for you
is better than anyone else's, including mine.

pp34
"And that goes for things
I tell you on the inside
as well outside channeled guidance like this."

Could you explain a bit more of the physics/boundaries/dynamics
of what's yours, the Mother's and mine ~
to feel, heal, and take responsibility for.
I find I want to give you 'big things' to put in their right place,
but I don't understand how giving you 'bad light' or feelings
isn't giving myself away or shirking responsibility.
Thank you for helping me.

"You are welcome.
Very simply put, the boundaries are all inside of you.
You have both Mother essence and Spirit essence 'running' in you,
in varying degrees at various times.
You as Body are in manifestation
as a result of both of our energies,
and the union of our essences create the presence of Heart in you.

Fourth Homepage
"There are many levels of reality.
When I ask you to give to me as Spirit
the pain of the Mother that you are holding,
I mean that as a metaphor
for your own magnetic essence and spirit essence to unite.
Of course on a deeper level
the reality is that I am you,
and the Mother is you,
so your inner union is our union as well.

"When I ask you to give me your 'bad light',
I mean that I am redeeming my own previously denied essence
and you can do the same by aligning your spirit essence with me.
It was my original denial of it that made it 'bad' in the first place.

"You ask about your responsibility.
If your intention is healing into wholeness,
then your responsibility is
to help the Mother and me come together in you,
healing body and heart,
and the gaps in the relationships among all four parts of you.
But because it is you who is doing this,
it must be in the unique way that works for you.

"Information here or in other channeled material
is meant to be helpful
and most definitely not to be dogma or in any way mandatory.
It is also your responsibility to do what is right for you,
and only you can be the judge of that.
Please do this work the way that suits you best,
and ask me on the inside for help or advice
if you feel unsure about what to do next.

"The purpose of the 'true sacrifice' practice is
to help your spirit essence
come into acceptance of the magnetic essence
that was previously judged against
because it did not feel good.
Whenever you ask me to come to you
with healing and acceptance,
and however that asking is done,
it is your own spirit that leads the way for me.
And when the Mother is present in you,
and you and she are willing,
your spirit and I can come to together
to join with you both in healing union.

"Because there are a lot of feelings to move and heal,
it is good to have an easy method of doing the healing work
whenever there's an opportunity.
Many opportunities for healing have been lost
because it has been felt that the process needed for the work
can be done only in certain places at certain times,
or with certain people.

"It can be very helpful to have an easy practice like this
that can be done anywhere at anytime,
and even while doing other things.
And we'll work together on the inside
to find the way that's best for you.

"There will be much more on the boundaries
you've mentioned in lesson four of the healing class.
In the meantime, please trust your self and your feelings
about what is right for you regarding the 'true sacrifice' process."

How can I achieve liberation in this lifetime?