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2004_10_15 Not completed; Read again and corrected: 2008_06_05
To YOU AS ONE,
SPIRIT~WILL~HEART~BODY
2004_10_14
My Beloved!
Thank you for giving me this hour,
alone in the desert in my tent,
and enough electricity , still supplied by the late afternoon sun.
Outside my tent, towards sunset on the "Kidod-Hills", where "Rakhaf"
is situated. Beyond the invisible "Kidod-Wadi": the town of Arad
Please let me make a new start with communicating with you.
So that then I may be able to focus on the present assignment of
"healing myself into wholeness and - by extension - all of Creation".
On
Sept. 29 you have resumed communicating with us through Godchannel!
What a joy! thank you so very much!
Though it is true, that "i can always reach you on the inside",
your words - forgive me - are more "credible", when they come from
the outside.
Ha,ha,ha
Yes, I'm a bit ashamed, but bear with me.
In any case, I feel loved and accepted and understood and
encouraged both ways.
Thank you!
"You are truly loved and accepted and understood
and encouraged, like all beings,
except that most don't know this ~~~~ or believe that they don't care."
The main judgment I want to release is,
that if I don't "produce success" concerning our ARARAT-vision,
I'll be evicted from this place, Rakhaf,
or at least ~ judged, ridiculed and despised.
(Ory: "If you have such a great vision,
why is it that you attract so much contempt from all around you?").
The judgment is: I have no legitimate place on this planet:
"Now wait a minute!
Wasn't your understanding in those two cases,
that people were evicting you,
not because you weren't doing anything,
but because they were afraid that you WOULD DO something?"
That is true.
And the same could be said about the eviction from Egypt,
though this was done unconsciously and collectively.
See Sinai
1996
Later - using the electricity of "Rakhaf's" generator
I
read about the dire need to release denial energy on
the global level.
How pathetic, that I have not yet released the judgment that I don't deserve
a place on this planet,
and that it's only me who needs "Rakhaf" and it's not the Rakhaf-people
who need me just as well.
If I deny my own basic right, what can I expect "on the global level"?
"Now, do not make yourself wrong, dear co-healer.
" Accept yourself as having clung to that denial in the past, because
you didn't know better,
release that denial, that judgment
" and accept and move the fear, that will re-appear for some time,
until you'll have cradled yourself into knowing and feeling,
that you ARE WELCOME and a BLESSING , wherever you are present.
Slowly or even quickly you will resonate this:
"I am a blessing for you and for you
who have a chance in this moment,
to be in my loving and whole presence."
A blessing for you, Hagai, my partner, and a blessing
for you, Tomer, my grandson...
I just opened the Puzzle
Piece 6, called "Judgment Release"
and see what I found - exactly in line with your message in the new Interview:
mishkan8.jpg) 2000/01-with Rotem's little brother in my pyramidal tent in my daughter's garden see My own Living in Pyramidal tents |
Maryam, 2001/09/07:a diary entry dated 2000/11/28 My Body, I promise to love myself
again. 1. I release
the judgment |
"You see?
And who was it who came to visit you on Rakhaf for two days? - Rotem, 11 years
old now.
And when you arranged that fantastic meeting between Rotem and the Bedouin
girl Khathra, also 11 years old,
didn't you feel deep satisfaction?"
[I can not dare to
take photos of a Bedouin girl, so Rotem on the southern "Breast
of Ararat" and Rotem sleeping in my tent will have to do here]:
Next morning:
I woke up with so much joy.
I was all alone and wanted to spoil myself by starting the generator,
something that's never done in the morning, because of the costs.
"I'll let it run for half an hour, work on the computer and get charge
for another 20 minutes,
by then the sun will be high enough to supply power to my solar battery and
from there to the computer."
I cleaned the kitchen, even the fridge, (of which only the freezer works a
bit, when the generator runs)
and which seems to have never been cleaned before, at least not since July
13 , when we arrived here,
put the plug of the computer in, so I would not loose one second of electricity,
and ran to start the generator:
IT WAS STOLEN!
Now!!! What a trigger !!!of my hole in my wholeness that
now wants to be healed!!
the hole of feeling "I am nothing but a disturbance in this world!"
"Yes , finally you had the chance to "prove"
to the people of Rakhaf,
that they are dependent on your watching the place,
and you were even bragging that you have so often been alone in the desert
and that nothing would happen to you,
and there you let those Bedouin thieves - on the first night of Ramadan -
steel the one thing worth to be stolen.
Are you making fun of me? Why did you let this happen?
Sa'ar and Narda and Ory have been here for 14 months among the Bedouin,
why is that the theft occurs exactly when I am the one in charge?
Why is that this is now the fourth time within 8 months,
that those people, the Bedouin, with whom you want me to work, steal from
me?
To add one more aspect to their utter contempt for "the old hag"?
"Dear Child!
The way you behave towards both, the people of Rakhaf and the Bedouin,
is dictated by your old defense mechanism of pleasing and pleading:
"Please accept me! See , how much you can benefit
from me, if only you let me be in your life."
You attracted a situation of failing Sa'ar, of letting him down,
so that at a time - when his financial worries are drowning him anyway - he
had to buy a new generator (9000 NIS).
Of course, he has his own lessons to learn there.
But YOUR lesson is, to resonate:
"My Divine Presence Heals"
even when I let someone down ~~~,
The someone is my benefactor, if you don't mind!
the one person who invited me to stay on his land!
and to stay there "for ever , if needed", he said.
"Exactly
Being a bad girl and being a bad girl towards your benefactor
and still resonate:
"My divine presence heals" is the lesson.
"We know that you still have a hard time to believe this even while being
a good girl.
But you have read and understood in our latest channeling,
that your deep desire for peers, for co-creators, will fulfil itself only
after you have moved "your frozen terror of being
an outcast."
Or in your own words:
Your terror - not so much frozen anymore
- of being a disturbance.
I can't see how I can ever truly adopt the belief,
 |
Puzzle
Piece 14: God's and My Will and Desire
|
Does this coincidence have a meaning?
"Of course , it has.
It is almost 18 years that you have struggled for this
"Meine Gegenwart heilt"
.
You have come full circle now.
You have created this situation on Rakhaf,
a situation where you have made yourself totally dependent on all three:
on Sa'ar, Narda and Ury, the people
on Rakhaf, who are providing you with a safe space to live in your tent,
on Tamir and Hagai, your Bedouin-like
partners,
who teach you how to transform both, German "Efficiency" and Bedouin
"Lack of Efficiency"
and on those 17 Bedouin families in
the Zealots' Valley above the Dead Sea.
You have seen, that you cannot be a good girl with the Bedouin, at least not
with the males.
Nor can you be a good girl with your "inefficient" partners.
Now , with the theft of the generator, you see, that even with the Rakhaf
people you can't be a good girl.
"Isn't this a beautiful
chance for applying and resonating that belief, more so:
for applying the knowing, that
MEINE GEGENWART HEILT
MY DIVINE PRESENCE HEALS
AND FRoM THERE TO ATTRACT YOUR PEERS AND PARTNERS,
CO-WORKERS AND CO-CREATORS?
Working together, they secure the new generator:
from left to right; Sa'ar, our benefactor, Ory, the manager of Rakhaf, my
partners Tamir and Hagai
[From the latest "Interview
with the Folks" ,
Is it okay to talk a little more here about the 'cooperation'
you mentioned?
Where do we find others to work with, and how do we relate with them?
"At present there are two distinct modes of relating
among humans, cooperation and competition.
Cooperation is like acceptance, it is inclusive and supportive.
Competition is like denial, it excludes and moves to surpass.
Cooperation is a reflection of love for self, projected
onto peers.
Competition is a reflection of denial of self, projected onto peers.
Cooperation begets unity and understanding.
Competition begets separateness and suspicion.
...
When your frozen terror
of being an outcast and separate fragment
begins to move in loving acceptance,
your taste for competition will fade.
When the denial is removed
and you have lovingly accepted all of the terror,
you will feel yourself to be safe, no matter what.
It is then that Original Heart's desire
for peers
[seePuzzle
Piece 2 and 2b: Peer
Companions]
will naturally draw you toward cooperation.
