I focus my experiencing and awareness on being
"a pioneer of Evolution
in learning to feel":
I let my Body vibrate and my Heart 'womb'
pain, shame, fear, boredom, powerlessness,
so feelings can >heal >guide>fulfill>evolve,
and ~~~ offer ~~~"goldmines"~~~ to us all!!
"I
want you to feel everything, every little thing!"
K.I.S.S. -
L O G 2
0 0 8
Keep It Simple Sweetheart
Know exactly what you want, communicate clearly what you want,
then get out of the way, live and play, and let happen what
may! 7:55 I desire my stomach to heal
thoroughly and my body and soul to feel again vigorous and vibrant
I desire to apply the given guidelines
for nourishing & nurturing, honoring & loving my Body: 1))
to ask each day to attract only the kind & amount of food,
which Body needs to live and love
2) to bless (= express gratitude) before opening my lips &
placing (not "stuffing") food
on my tongue,
a) an aspect of Nature or a process or a person
to which I owe this food and its coming into my hands
b) to a specific organ or function in Body or its capacities
to sense, feel, think, - nurtured by this food
image of the day: by intention disgusting in sight and bad in
quality! Portion depicting Gluttony
in Hieronymus Bosch's The Seven Deadly Sins and the Four Last
Things
hodayot [thanksgivings] for
today
8:25
My Body, my Partner,
my God
I give thanks to the gradual healing of our stomach,
and for the lesson which seems to be your quest: "HONOUR
ME!". But having relapsed over & over
again into gluttony, addiction, trauma-patterns
I implore you to help me train the behavior through which
I honor you.
Let this be also a symbolic training to strengthen Tomer and
all people,
who need & want to BECOME FREE of addictive,
damaging behavior.
I'm grate-full for the quiet of my castle and the space of
my time today
I'm grate-full for the air in my desert and in my garden,
I'm grate-full for the water in my taps and in the pool.
I'm grate-full for my electricity and my computer,
and for the
software Dreamweaver which allows me to sculpt this.
I'm grate-full for the possibility to choose new input, in
amount & content,
via Internet, TV and books.
And most of all I am grate-full
that all my 26 actors are alive, healthy and well: Immanuel, Efrat & Mika, Elah, Alon,
Tomer - Micha, Ra'ayah & and Arnon, Ayelet
Ronnit, Uri & Jonathan, Rotem, Yael, Itamar - Ofir, Meital
& Lior, Amit
Lior Oren, Zipi, Gal, Boris, Dina, Meshi
Lior Oren asked for
a lesson
in how to study the Hebrew Bible.
I said, that I'm fed up with dedicating time to people,
who give up after a feeble attempt to do what I advise:
how to use the concordance, both online and in paper,
which is the only effective method
to draw benefit from the "holy" text,
"holy" in the sense of "whole", for as the
ancient sages said: "In the Torah each verse is in need
of each verse,
for what one closes, the other opens."
But she pleaded with me and promised
to stick to it,
and after she reminded me again in an e-mail,
I'm now keeping my promise,
by demonstrating through the search for her name,
li - or, I have light,
and the one verse which came up: Micah 7:8
how I go about teaching myself.
Here is the
King James version of the entire verse
-(though the part about "my enemy", in female form,
is not relevant for Lior, nor for me: Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy:
when I fall, I shall arise;
when I sit in darkness,
the LORD shall be a light unto me.
Jonathan, Shalom!
Though you may not have been aware,
that your letter would reach also me,
I'm glad, that now I at least have your address,
though this doesn't mean that the time is ripe to renew the contact.
I wrote to you after you visited me
in May 2006,
also in order to thank you for the Zen book you sent me,
but the letter returned,
What stayed in my mind, was your sentence,
that you want to dedicate your life to your Joshua, your son.
I was glad then,
and I am glad now, that and what you reported on him,
though the other part - how YOU heal and grow through him- is
missing.
Yishaar kokhkha - Rachel
Jonathan, once (from 1979 onward-
see "Partnership") one of my three "twin-brothers",with
his two sons in USA, and on my veranda in Arad, May 2006
Finetuning
to my Present
Shame - the old theme - but not about big things,
not like in the new reality program "Polygraph" on
Channel 2,
but about the uncompleted pages on Healingkiss in general &
on Kisslog in particular.
It is incredible, that I seem to be still unable to make my
peace with feeling judged!
It is 16:33 and I feel without any strength,
letters - Martin, Lior, Jonathan Jacobi, Yael, Deqel, from Immanuel,
(about the pleasant talk with the therapist of Bnei-Arazim,
but also about the strain of having to go all over again over
the history of T).
Later Efrat called me to ask about my stomach
and told that Immanuel woke up with nausea
and that - "by the wa" - he had high blood-pressure
"like his father".
"I fell, I got up, for when in darkness
YHWH is light for me".
I don't feel this today, and I don't even care.
I only feel grate-full, that nothing is expected from me
and I endlessly pity the people, who are in situations,
where they are expected to perform a task,
from being a mother and housewife to being a popstar or prime-minister...
song
of the day: created today in the morning-pool
first
example:
Right nutrition will be prepared for me today,
thanks to whom picked the banana,
thanks to my voice
which is nourished by the banana.
second
example:
Right nutrition will be ready for me today.
Thanks to the sun which grew the wheat,
thanks to my stomach
which is nourished by this berad
My
"Grace" before whatever I put in my mouth
- to be adapted to what ever it is I place on my tongue
following the tune of "shalom-shalom",
which includes all 8 tones of an octave
Continuation
of my virtual journey to Petra - with the help of Arnon's
photos
From now on Arnon's archive seems to include
the photos of their friends.
Most of them chose the same views, which I can now watch from slightly
different perspectives
and photographed with better technical equipment
As to more
images of Arnon's physical and my virtual journey to Petra,
- see tomorrow
